Is letting your hair go grey brave?
This comes up from time to time and everyone has a different opinion, but my stance is that YES, for some of us, letting your hair go grey absolutely is. It really is different for everyone. However I would say for many women, it is a difficult decision to stop the dye and a brave one. Bravery is defined in the dictionary as ‘dealing with a difficult or unpleasant situation without fear.’
You might be reading this and thinking, ‘but what about those who are battling cancer or are going through some sort of difficult life tragedy?’ Well, it goes without saying, that these people are extremely brave and I am by no means comparing bravery of going grey with bravery of a personal loss, illness or tragedy. I am talking about it purely in context. The context of doing something that is generally against the status quo, that is still somewhat stigmatised in society today, particularly for women. On top of that, going grey at any age can be a confronting change.
Many of us start our going grey journeys by seeking out others with grey hair. Depending on your age and where you live, it can be difficult to find others in our peer groups with grey hair, because most women still choose to dye their grey. So you go online looking for inspiration. We notice that actually going grey may not be so bad after all. So, we pluck up the courage to mention it to our family and friends, but some are not convinced. Many of them are completely against it and may let you know, in no uncertain terms, that it is a bad idea. This can instil doubt because, after all, could they be right?
Despite some of the negative reactions, you plough on anyway and you start your transition to grey hair with conviction and it is not always easy. You push through the negativity and you turn up every day and show the world your growing grey roots at the hairline. It’s difficult not to have questions going through your mind. “What must others be thinking? Strangers and work colleagues must think I am letting myself go? I don’t feel myself…” and all these similar emotions that run so much deeper than just hair. But despite it all, you get on with life the best you can because you have to. You battle through the negativity and doubt regardless because you have determination and your goal in sight- your own authentic grey hair colour.
This, in my opinion, is brave!
Can you relate to this?
If you do, and you are going through the going grey process, then you must find time to praise and be easy on yourself. Gosh, we can be so hard on ourselves sometimes and perhaps your going grey journey is a perfect opportunity to take stock and decide that you don’t need other people’s approval anymore. You need to balance up the negativity you may be feeling, whether it’s from others or just your own negative self talk, with positivity and keep your goal in mind. Before you know it, you will be there. Here is a list of positive activities you can do to help you nurture and encourage yourself during and after this sometimes difficult going grey journey.
Step 1- Join Instagram and search up grey hair, going grey and similar key words to find other women who are going through this too. You are likely to find a huge network of support from other people online and I can’t emphasise how useful this could be for you. Connect with me via the social buttons on my site as a starting point if you are not on Instagram yet. The same can be said for Pinterest, although PInterest is purely a search engine, so it’s more useful for inspiration rather than support. Facebook has some great pages too that are good for sharing your experiences with others who are going grey too.
Step 2- Start a going grey diary. Buy a pretty notebook and start off with your picture of the last time you dyed your hair (or around that time) and then every month thereafter print off another photo of you and your hair and underneath the picture describe how you are feeling and anything else you want to express. You will feel so good reading back on this and see how far you have come.
Step 3- Don’t stop going to the salon. Treat yourself to regular trims, nourishing conditioning treatments or glazes for shine or even semi permanent toners that enhance your silvers. These can help with any yellowing in the hair too. Now that I am not forking out a lot of money on dyeing my hair, I treat myself to a professional blow dry more often because I feel so good when my hair is looking glamorous regardless of the transitioning colour. If your budget doesn’t support this, you can buy at home treatments that you can use. A great excuse is to put a deep conditioning treatment in your hair, light some candles and have a relaxing bath!
Step 4- Buy hair products specifically for your hair type. This will be blue shampoo (to use sparingly to keep yellowing at bay) and nourishing conditioners. My favourite products are from the shea moisture and trepadora range.
Step 5- Positive Self Talk. Look in the mirror and tell yourself how amazing you are. BECAUSE YOU ARE! Forget what your hair looks like now, in the big scheme of things, it doesn’t really matter. Your hair will be healthier and more beautiful as the new hair grows in. Think of this as your cocoon stage and the end result is the butterfly. You will be the butterfly soon enough.
Let me know how you manage your going grey journey. Do you think it is brave? Please comment positively below.